I am a Backbone not a Wishbone!
How many times have you talked to someone and they have told you I truly want a better way?
They say I tired of being broke, I am over my boss and telling me what to do, I truly want to connect to my Dreams.
And when push comes to shove they are just wishbones not backbones.
You provide them the vehicle and the path that they can achieve their goals and dreams, all they have to do is put gas in the vehicle, and they do not walk their talk.
When you tell them you this will take time, energy, effort, and sacrifice, they do not want to embrace it.
And sometimes they would rather believe the hype and overnight sensation talk because it is quick and easy. Sure.
Do you want an economic answer?
Do you want time and financial freedom?
Do you want to make a difference for thousands of people all over the world?
Are you a backbone?

Do You Seek Wishbones Or Backbones To Be In Your Network Marketing Business?
- by Andy Acciaioli
Those of us who have been in network marketing for any length of time have experienced the vast majority of wishful thinkers (the wishbones). And yet there are those people who join our groups who are motivated and have the conviction of getting it done no matter what (the backbones).
First "no's", wishbones snap.

The “wishbones” wish for success to appear out of some far off land and grace their network marketing business with a gazillion new reps. Their “backbone” counterparts are too busy building their businesses one team member at a time.
It would be nice if we could only sponsor the “backbones”. But the reality is most times it is impossible to determine between the two. We are so anxious to build our businesses that we practically accept anyone into our business who can breathe.
“Wishbones” are not only a waste of our time and energy but will either discourage or relieve us when they eventually leave. (More often than not, they will seek greener pastures with the next, great, spectacular mlm that will become number one in its niche within forty-eight hours. Good luck.)
I willingly admit that I hold out hope for anyone joining my group. There are times when I want them to succeed more than they want themselves to succeed. I am sure you have heard all the popular network marketing expressions such as you cannot push rope up a hill or you cannot drag anyone over the finish line. As trite as these expressions were when I first heard them, they still apply today.
You might say it is different now with the internet. You are right, it is different. The internet has expanded the base of “wishbones” exponentially with no boundaries. It truly is the WWW (World Wide Wishbones). Everyone who has a computer – or access to one – is confident that they will make a killing on it and get all 1.7 billion users to buy from them or join their mlm.
The “backbones” realize that the internet is a tool to reach others. Their style of working online mimics their style of how they prospect offline: build a relationship with a potential prospect first before attempting to introduce their business to the prospect. Maybe the prospect never gets to the stage of the “backbone” sharing their business with them. Perhaps the “backbone” feels as though this person is a net-wisher as opposed to a net-worker.
After having been involved with network marketing over the past 18 years, I can assure you that most potential prospects will either qualify or disqualify themselves in very subtle ways. Not following through on small tasks such as visiting your website (“I didn’t get a chance to go on the site”) or not calling you when they say they will (“I got so tied up and then completely forgot to call”). Not showing up at a business presentation when they assured you they would be there. Any one of these should raise the red flag that you might be dealing with a “wishbone”. (On the other hand, if your prospect follows through on all the small tasks, that is the person that you should want to work with.)
You are the “backbone” of your group. Get other “backbones” involved and you will see just how unstoppable your will become. Get “wishbones” involved and they will snap early on after experiencing the least amount of rejection (the dreaded “no”) when offering their business opportunity to others.


June 22nd, 2011 at 11:33 pm
Maggie,
I agree with all the work and time one must put into building a real business. The plus is that they must realize they do have a team of passionate, and dedicated people who only focus on their success, as they determined it to be.
They still will need that push some more than others. Just till they develop a hunger for getting thier dreams manifested to reality. That is your job to empower them with all the skillful tools in your arsonal.
You lead by example and others will follow a powerful coach such as yourself. Not all will get it right the first time. Some may put it off for over a year. Yet, if they develop a real hunger that is when they will live thier dreams and need you to show them how. Your work will be well rewarded.
Just seeing how people's lives change for the better. They were the little step people, that became great leaders of our industry. All because of your determination and patients.
Maggie thank you for bringing this into light. I need to review this information for all the new members I have been blessed with in this little week. Now the empowerment comes.
June 23rd, 2011 at 5:57 am
What a great comment William!
You are so right.
I know that if one has the will and work ethic to truly build their business Success will be there.
Thank you so much!
June 23rd, 2011 at 11:25 pm
This is really great advice, Maggie.
Anyone who has tried to "make" somebody do, think or act the way they need to in order to achieve the results they desire… Anyone who has tried to "make" anyone do anything for that matter… knows that you can't force people to work hard, to show up on time, and you certainly can't force them to succeed.
I would suggest, though, having worked with both backbones and wishbones, that you try this. Work with the backbones, and like you said, they will lift up your business as much as you lift them up. But, if you're so inclined, challenge the wishbones to forget about getting involved in any business (including yours), until they undergo some personal development. Then offer to enroll them in a personal development group that you lead on a regular basis. Some of them will actually begin to grow, not because of you, but because they finally see where they've failed repeatedly in the past. You might even open the group to your backbones as well, because hey, what successful people do you know that got so great that they could afford to stop growing and learning.
Great post. Thanks for your years of insight.
June 24th, 2011 at 6:52 am
What a wonderful comment David!
You are so right.
Personal development is so very important.
I have been involved with my network marketing business for 16 plus years
and it was like I plopped down a million dollars in a personal development course.
Thank you!
June 24th, 2011 at 10:25 am
Maggie,
I so agree with what you and Andy have to say. I always ask first if they are curious or serious. Most I never hear back from. Why is that? Wishbones!
How do you find backbones? Now, that's a question. I think you have to give your prospects an MRI. Peak into their past, their present and their future.
The MRI, MLM Response Indicator, (I just made that up)is giving a few simple tests and see how they follow through. Do they bring anything to the table when you speak with them.
Life is short and business is hard. No sense wasting time on the wishbones until, like David said, they've invested in their self development.
Thanks, Maggie,
RICK
June 24th, 2011 at 10:29 am
WOW! Rick. I loved your comments.
How profound.
Thank you
June 24th, 2011 at 9:59 pm
Hi Diva Maggie,
Thanks for sharing your post and Andy's post…it is so true…especially when you see the attrition rate we have in the Industry today.
So many Networkers, including supposed Leaders are out there pitching a new deal every other day and getting others to jump with them. They have NO shot at becoming "backbones", since they don't work their business for any real length of time. So many Networkers are too impatient and lack the commitment, focus, perseverance and fortitude to treat the business like a SERIOUS business.
If you want duplication and respect, then you have to have integrity and too many "wishbones" are missing the key ingredients and it certainly does start with personal development…you MUST make the time to work on yourself.
Here's one of my favorite Jim Rohn quotes..
"You can help a thousand, but you cannot carry 3 on your back. Learn to help those who deserve, not those
who need"
Keep inspiring us,
Marc
June 24th, 2011 at 10:26 pm
Amazing Marc!
Awesome comment,
How true by Jim Rohn.
Thank you so much my friend.
June 24th, 2011 at 10:50 pm
Maggie – GREAT INSIGHT and STRAIGHT TALK
I know I’ve been a wishbone.. I confess but, there’s the old saying: “When The Student Is Ready, The Teacher Will Appear”… I am a student of life and am constantly learning. Through the support of amazing friends … our dreams can come true.
Sometimes a wishbone is because the BELIEF system is just not ingrained enough for us to trust ourselves to be the best we can be. With support from us, that wishbone can turn into a “Dream Come True”. Often we tend to spend too much time nurturing without letting the student fly on their own and gaining the strength to make their own decisions. Those decisions are such that they need to have a burning desire which is their WHY. Once their WHY is their vision, the rest can fall into place to give them the backbone.
Thanks for sharing
Ruth
June 25th, 2011 at 7:53 am
Thanks so much Ruth.
It is personal development beyond belief.
You are right, people need to get out of the nest and fly.
June 25th, 2011 at 12:54 pm
Hey Maggie,
This is a really important post for any network and internet marketer. I think it needs to be said that there are some people who just don't talk the talk, of course there are those who do have a backbone, but who quit because they realize they have made a wrong decision, don't have the skills they need or don't have the much needed support.
So as well as finding backbones, I think it is important to support them, kinda ironic when you think what a backbone is supposed to do.
I think this post is a gentle reminder that it is easy to spot the wishbones from the backbones and perhaps we should re-evaluate who we spend our time supporting.
Thank you for sharing,
Beth
June 25th, 2011 at 1:57 pm
You are so right Beth!
I truly appreciate your great comment.
June 27th, 2011 at 3:12 am
HI Maggie,
What a great way to describe the two types of prospect! My goodness, it certainly is difficult to distinguish between the two.
I see a lot of people jumping around from company to company promoting something new every week. They may have the potential to become a backbone but it will take some time if they don't quit first!
I work with a team that offers essential training and is always there for each other and I think this helps people stick with it because they feel supported until they can support themselves and become a backbone!
All the best,
Emma
June 27th, 2011 at 6:34 am
Thanks Emma.
Yes if one has the will and desire and takes action they too can become personally developed
and become a backbone.
June 27th, 2011 at 2:53 pm
Hey Maggie~
This is such a great concept. We all know we can't "push spaghetti up a hill" in our business. Or at least it's a royal pain to try with those "wishbone" folks day after day. It's like they have a lottery mentality, and expect a handout, or for the business, (up line) to give them something like you say. Working with the true leaders, the "backbone" folks has always been how we have built strong livings. Of course we do find the wishbone people, but they have a way of weeding themselves out, and we don't have to do it for them, because we lead by example!! I KNOW you do as well!!
Great Post Maggie!!
Your Friend
Laura Morris
June 27th, 2011 at 2:57 pm
Thanks Laura.
I truly appreciate your comment.
You are so right.
Friends Always,
Maggie
June 28th, 2011 at 6:30 am
LOL. World Wide Wishbones
I have encountered both in my short time in MLM.
But I believe that a wishbone can be turned into a backbone.
Not by you, not by me, but by a strong enough reason.
Most wishbones do exactly that – wish.
But when you get their back against the wall, rally get them into a corner, then they descover a backbone – and that is usually when they start to experience a profound lifechange.
I know
My baby girl changed me from a wishbone to a backbone
Thanks for the great post
Ben
June 28th, 2011 at 7:32 am
Wow Ben. Yes a WHY that makes you cry.
That is what drives you and makes you a backbone.
Thank You for your comment.
June 28th, 2011 at 4:03 pm
Hi Maggie,
I love your article on wishbones and backbones. I think I know what you are! It really is a blessing in disguise when potential partners filter themselves out and it is really easy to tell if it's worth having on your team. If they have excuses in the beginning, that is a sure indicator that they will continue the same pattern. It takes too much energy to work with someone who is not willing to put in the time and effort required to become successful. It is so much better to work with leaders. They are the true backbone of any business.
I'm impressed that you have been marketing for 18 years! You are obviously seasoned:) Along with that comes wisdom and the all time wonderful cliche' "Been there. Done that." It's worth staying strong, sticking with it, being a leader, and building a team. Wishbones cannot do that. Thanks!
Raena Lynn
June 28th, 2011 at 10:46 pm
I love the way you used backbone versus wishbone. The imagery really strikes a cord. I my experience with MLM's if you listen really hard to the person, you can usually tell the wishbones. At first it is difficult, but being at it for some time makes you differentiate the two. I just love the backbone people. I agree with Ben when he says, when their back is against the wall they may get a backbone.
But, as a "leader" sometimes we need to give people a little confidence, and a slight push to help them grow that backbone. The wishbones can stay on the back burners.
Thanks for this post…I enjoyed it so much.
Donna
June 28th, 2011 at 11:32 pm
Hi Maggie,
Great analogy! I just never get it why people are so opposed to doing that work involved in bringing them closer to their goals, vision and success. It's beyond me. I would much rather be around and work with those who are committed to achieving everything they want in life and giving back, those who have a backbone and leave the wishing for the wishbones!
June 29th, 2011 at 6:51 am
Hi Loren,
Thanks so much.
They are in denial.
They say I will be fine and wait until their back is against the wall.
June 29th, 2011 at 6:52 am
Thanks Donna.
Great comment and I appreciate it.
June 29th, 2011 at 6:53 am
Thank you so much Raena.
I have seen it with my eyes.
You give someone an assignment and they do not complete it,
It is a pattern.
I say sink your teeth into a project and do whatever it takes!
July 1st, 2011 at 11:57 am
[...] is choosing a company for the long run with a product that [...]
August 19th, 2011 at 8:37 am
[...] about embrace network marketing where you can impact thousands of people in a positive [...]